I want to think out loud a bit. What follows are not polished conclusions. They are raw thoughts I am cobbling together as I try to understand something that feels just beyond my vocabulary. If I miss a point or fail to draw a necessary distinction, show me grace. I am circling something that feels important, but I am still working on the language.

I have been studying spiritual formation deeply lately. Dallas Willard. James Gifford Jr and his Perichoretic Salvation. Major Ian Thomas and his insistence that only Christ can live the Christ life. Brother Lawrence and his quiet communion while washing dishes. They are not using identical terminology, but they seem to be pointing toward the same center. Mutual indwelling. Christ in us and we in Him.

But what does that actually mean?

When Gifford talks about perichoretic salvation, he is drawing from Trinitarian language. The Father, Son, and Spirit mutually indwell one another. That divine communion is unique. We do not become the Trinity. And yet Scripture speaks plainly. Abide in me. Christ in you. The hope of glory. Is that metaphorical language? Is it psychological? Is it relational in the way two close friends influence each other? Or is something ontologically real happening at a spiritual level that cannot be reduced to influence?

Consider marriage. Over time a husband and wife begin to anticipate each other’s thoughts. They finish each other’s sentences. They respond in similar ways. Is that mystical? Is that supernatural? Or is it simply familiarity and love expressed through attention? If you love someone, you study them. You care about their reactions. You become sensitive to their patterns. That makes sense. It is relational formation. It is beautiful, but it is understandable.

Is our union with Christ simply that at a higher level?

Dallas Willard speaks about keeping ourselves in the Word. Saturating the mind in Scripture. Learning how Jesus would respond in a given situation. In many ways that sounds like those old bracelets that asked, what would Jesus do? You immerse yourself in the Gospels. You internalize Christ’s responses. You pattern your behavior accordingly.

But is that just programming?

We know the brain can be shaped. Neuroplasticity is not controversial. Cognitive behavioral therapy retrains thought patterns. The ancient Stoics understood that attention shapes character. Even pop culture captures it with startling clarity.

“Your focus determines your reality.” – Qui‑Gon Jinn, The Phantom Menace

If that is true, then what we watch, what we read, who we spend time with, what music fills our ears, all of it shapes us. We are programmers whether we admit it or not. The only real question is what are we programming ourselves toward? If you immerse yourself in pornography, you shape your mind toward lust. If you immerse yourself in outrage, you shape your mind toward anger. If you immerse yourself in Scripture, you shape your mind toward Christ.

So if you want to be like Christ, you must know Christ. You must read the Gospels repeatedly. You must meditate on His words. You must let your imagination be saturated with His character. That will absolutely shape you. I have no doubt about that.

But here is the tension I cannot shake. Is that all that is happening?

If I look like Christ because I have trained my mind to think like Christ, is that indwelling? Or is that simply formation? Is Christ living His life through me because I have patterned my neural pathways in a certain direction? Or is there a deeper reality where the Holy Spirit is actually present and active beyond my cognitive processes?

I do not want to dismiss the first layer. It matters. Guarding your inputs matters. Being critical about what you read matters. Flagging ideas that do not sit well with Scripture matters. If you do not guard your formation, you will drift. So yes, discipline matters. Attention matters. Saturation matters.

But Brother Lawrence complicates the picture. He was not merely rehearsing Scripture mentally while washing dishes. He described active communion. A conversational awareness of God’s presence in the ordinary tasks of life. That feels qualitatively different from programming the brain. It feels personal. Relational. Immediate.

Is there more than one layer here?

Perhaps there is a formational layer where we cooperate with grace by shaping our attention, guarding our inputs, immersing ourselves in truth. That is real. But perhaps there is also a participatory layer where the Spirit is actively present in a way that transcends our neurological explanations. Not opposed to them, but not reducible to them.

When Scripture says Christ in you, is that simply shorthand for Christ like patterns in your mind? Or is it a real spiritual presence that cannot be mapped onto brain scans? When Eastern theology speaks of theosis, participation in divine life, are they speaking poetically? Or are they describing something deeply real that Western categories struggle to articulate?

I am not rejecting discipline. I am not rejecting formation. I am saying discipline may prepare the ground, but presence is what fills it. Saturating the mind may align the will, but communion feels like something more than alignment. It feels like relationship.

How do you allow Christ to live His life through you? You read Scripture. You pray. You guard your attention. You cultivate awareness. But is there also a posture of surrender that invites something beyond self-programming? Something beyond self-directed moral improvement?

I feel like I am touching the tip of an iceberg. I do not yet have the vocabulary to describe the depths beneath the surface. But I wanted to capture these thoughts now, before they become neat and tidy. Perhaps in a few years I will look back and realize I was circling something that had not yet fully dawned on me.

For now, I am content to ask the question. Is Christ merely influencing me? Or is He truly indwelling me in a way that reshapes not just my thoughts but my very being? And if the latter is true, how do I cooperate with that reality without reducing it to technique?

If you have clearer language for what I am trying to articulate, I welcome it. I am still learning how to speak about this without flattening it. Show me grace as I work it out.

Excerpt

Is Christ merely influencing my thoughts, or truly indwelling my being? As I wrestle with Perichoretic Salvation, spiritual formation, and theosis, I am exploring whether union with Christ is simply disciplined attention or something deeper, spiritual, and supernatural. These are raw reflections as I seek clearer language.

Parousia Pending