Pastor Dean,

You mentioned that the Marriage Supper of the Lamb came to mind when we talked about the third type of perichoretic relationship, and I wanted to follow up on that. Interestingly, Gifford does touch on this theme in the book. He describes three metaphors that Scripture uses for our relationship with our Creator: covenant, marriage, and adoption. He shows how each of these aligns with and illuminates the idea of this third form of perichoresis.

It’s funny—my wife once told me she had dated a few men before we met but never saw them as marriage material because, in her words, “they all wanted a mom or a housekeeper.” She said what she longed for was someone to participate in life with. She felt she found that in me, and it wasn’t until our men’s group met this week to discuss the marriage as a metaphor or type of perichoretic relationship in chapter 4 that it fully hit me: this is exactly what marriage is meant to be. The more I reflect on it, the more sense it makes.

In fact, it casts new light on the passage “the two shall become one flesh.” If you think about humanity in terms of male and female as complementary halves—each fully human but each lacking aspects the other possesses—then together they form the fullness of what it means to be human. That idea isn’t in the book; it’s just something I’ve been pondering. It certainly opens the door to new ways of thinking about gender questions today or the issue of same-sex marriage, though that would require much more research.

All that said, I pulled together a few quotes from the book on marriage that I thought you might find interesting. These are from the section of chapter 4 that discusses marriage as a way of talking about this third type of perichoretic relationship.

“Their active participation in each other’s lives in Eden points to a relationship with perichoretic qualities before the fall, though this relationship is not on the same level as the soteriological union.”

“The new life created by a marriage fuses a man and wife together into one, fully shared human experience, prompting mutual care, tenderness, and love.” – Raymond Ortlund

“One flesh’ refers to the becoming one of the entire nature of the man and the woman. There is a oneness of bodies and souls, of thinking and desiring, of hopes and disappointments, of labors and goals. There is a oneness of the whole of earthly life; the husband and wife share one life.” – David Engelsma

“The two people do not merge into one person, but neither are they completely separate.”

“The analogy does suggest, however, that Paul conceives the union with Christ to be as real as the physical union created by sexual intercourse.” – Aaron Son

“He draws upon the original creation language of Genesis 2 and calls the words “For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh” a mystery, which ultimately concerns Christ and the church.”

“Humans have the ability to transcend themselves so that real indwelling and participation in others is possible.”

“That cannot be, I suggest, except by perichoresis. To become one marital person, each spouse must actively make room for and interweave hand in hand with the other, physically, psychologically, religiously, in such wise that each shares as full and equal spouse in the one concrete nature of this marriage.” – Michael Lawler

“The relational nature of marriage is analogous in human form to the divine Trinity. As Father, Son, and Holy Spirit (three distinct persons) mutually indwell in a trinitarian fellowship, spouses mutually indwell in the marriage union. . . . As spouses mutually permeate one another they achieve an interdependency (emotional connection) in which neither spouse loses distinctiveness. Unity and distinction coexist.” – Jack and Judy Balswick

“In marital terms, both spouses bring their distinct selves (mutual interiority) while making space for the other (mutual permeation) so they can indwell each other (interdependence) and become an entity (union) that transcends themselves.” – Jack and Judy Balswick

“First, it shows that a perichoretic relationship can include humans, not just the divine Persons. Second, human marriage is a symbol of the union, and Paul shows marriage was instituted to reflect the union. Human marriage makes one flesh. The ultimate marriage is one spirit.”

Excerpt

This reflection explores how marriage serves as a profound metaphor for the third type of perichoretic relationship—a mutual indwelling that mirrors the love shared within the Trinity and between Christ and the believer. Drawing on Pastor Dean’s insights and key quotes from Gifford’s Perichoretic Salvation, I reflect on how “two becoming one flesh” reveals the deeper mystery of relational participation.